Peer Invitation: Voila! Instant Participation

The last post was all suspension and gloom.  So, as promised, the good news...


Fickle Fan actually went to a high school dance.  He came home last week (before the dreaded suspension incident), and pulled out a slip of paper he'd been handed in school.  A couple of kids told him about the dance marathon, a fundraiser for Riley Children's Hospital, and told him he could register online.


The shocker here is that we've been trying to get him to participate in school events, including dances, all year long.  In his last case conference we even asked that extra-curricular social activity and interactions be written in as a goal on his IEP.  It's there (sort of), but the school, unfortunately, hasn't addressed it at all.  And, of course, because we're Parents--and therefore pariahs, never to be respected or trusted in the world of teens--nothing we suggest to FF is a good idea.


So what was different this time? A student (or maybe students, I'm not sure) personally invited him to come. That's so key and something we've been trying to get through to the school for the last four years. FF is far more likely to participate and engage in an activity if a peer (preferably someone he admires) asks him to do something.  Whoever the student was (I wish I could personally thank him/her/them) explained that it was a fundraiser for a good cause, that it would be fun, that he wouldn't need to dress up, and that FF wouldn't even have to dance.  He could just come, hang out and enjoy.


And he did.  I'll admit it was a little nervewracking for us. My husband dropped him off at the school door (and, mind you, this was not HIS school but one across town) and we waited for his call.  And waited. And waited. We knew he wouldn't stay very long--we estimated an hour--but when we didn't hear from him, we started to get a little nervous. My husband's calls to FF's cell phone weren't answered. I knew it was too loud in the gym to hear his phone, so that didn't really bother me.  But after an hour and a half, the can't-stand-it-any-longer Dad went to the school, peeked in to the gym and saw FF off in the distance texting on his phone  


Sure enough, my husband gets a text: "Whts up?" Husband replies: "Just checking to see if you're ready to leave yet." FF's reply: "Not yet." Halleluyah!! He stayed another hour before texting to say he was ready to be picked up. Definitely a happy camper when he came home.  Said he had a great time. Yes!!


Now if only we could have another student personally ask him to participate in graduation.  As of right now, May 25 could be an anti-climactic end to a Herculean effort (ours and his) to get FF's general diploma.  Oh well.  FF may not want to party, but I'm darn tootin' sure taking my husband out somewhere for a toast or two and some mutual "Job well done, Spouse!" pats on the back.